So I have been a hijabi for a little over seven months now.  I have had my ups and downs with wearing it.  I wear it at my own free will and by my choice.  I find it very beautiful, not just on myself, but on all who wears it.  I love everything about it and what it stands for.  Though sometimes I question myself on if I might be in over my head.

I don't live in the best place to be wearing it.  I have not seen any other hijabi's  at all.  I'm starting to think they aren't existing here.  I have seen a few at the mall up in the city, but that is a two hour drive from my home.  I was only up there because sometimes Bubba {my son} has doctor/dentist appointments up that way.  So when/if he does, we make it a plan to hang out since we don't get the opportunity often.

I really hate being here alone.  Alone as in not knowing other sisters.  I have been on the verge of just not wearing it at all and then once I move, go ahead and start over.  I do plan on moving and where I will be moving had a huge Muslim community.  I get really sad a lot just thinking bout it all.  I feel like maybe I just into it so quickly. Wearing the hijab I mean.  I hear other stories of sisters taking their Shahadah (declaration of faith) in a Mosque and with other people around.  I took mine at home by myself with no witnesses.  I had to turn to the internet for help and to get questions answered, only to find out that I was given wrong information.

So what's the point in trying when you have no one to turn too.  I have regular "Facebook friends" but that's where it stops.  I can't call them with questions, or even go hand out with them. They all live too far away.  All I can do is leave them a post on Facebook but even then, the answers I get are criticizing and judgmental half the time.

Anyway, I'm gonna sleep, think and pray on this for a few days to see what happens.